I always run. In my head. I can’t stop unless I force myself. I noticed that it’s not the goals or the ideas that exhaust me. Not even the manic ways in which I try to accomplish them. Planning. Endless planning of everything takes the energy out of me. 3 days ago I chose not to plan anything for the next month and just welcome my ideas and brainstorm them when I really want to (instead of planning to brainstorm them). Because plans change as often as I make them. In the end I spend half of my time planning things that never happen. Isn’t there a better way to spend life? Like go outside and walk and create mental space? Some things definitely need planning, but I think not as many as I think. And not as often as I think.
As I’m reading about center-focused exposure feature of my camera I can’t help but make a connection with real life. Center focused metering setting is just what it sounds like – a camera chooses the center of an image to calculate exposure, or light, that will be reflected in the entire photograph. Do we do something similar in our personal life? Do we “calculate”, judge, and project our life based on what’s in the immediate center of it, oftentimes blind to the entire picture? Perhaps because it’s simply outside our focus range? Another metering setting is called Matrix. With Matrix a camera takes the entire frame into consideration when calculating light. Can we project life in a similar way, seeing the entire picture that fills our frame of life and not just its center? Can we go even farther and see beyond the limits of framing? All 360 degrees?